We’ve looked at a lot great failures in television over the course of the website’s history. Most of them were chosen through careful consideration, after selecting twelve of the worst cable and network channels and making each of them send tribute shows to fight to the death, allowing only one to remain. However, I’m not going to lie to you- when I decided to review Tim Allen’s Last Man Standing, it was based on no careful thought processes or prudent decisions, intentionally, because, let’s face it, nothing with Tim Allen in it ever is. This is a man who elected to be a talking Santa Claus, a plastic Santa Claus, and an embittered Tim Allen at a Santa Claus-Themed Disney World, all in chronological order. A lot of celebrities like to be in kids movies so their children have something with them in it to watch. Chris Rock can’t exactly come home from a long day at work and show his kids his latest HBO special, which was why he was in all those shitty Madagascar movies. But three Santa Clauses- that’s just setting your standards too low. The only good thing he was ever in was Toy Story, and since then, it’s all been downhill, thanks to another unfeeling process in Hollywood- Eddie Murphying. You take a comedian with a lot of talent who decides to be in a movie for his kids, then maybe another movie for kids, and then it’s a slippery slope to Meet Dave. The same thing happened with Adam Sandler. Sorry, but people in drag isn’t funny- even when Monty Python did it.
